How do you display emotional control?

When something goes wrong in life, do you tell yourself, “Of course something terrible would happen to me,” or instead, do you say, “Well, I guess we’ll have to push through this and move forward.”

How you react to different situations greatly affects the quality of your life. If you fall into the habit of associating negative feelings with situations that are outside of your control, you’ll start to feel overwhelmed, stressed and eventually, depressed. Not only do negative emotional habits prevent us from being truly happy, but ultimately, they limit you from reaching your goals.

You tell yourself, “Why try if I’m just going to be disappointed?” so you never go after your dreams at all. If you want to learn how to control your emotions, the first step is realizing you can’t control every event in your life, but you CAN control your reactions. Start by changing the story you tell yourself. If you begin to believe that life is happening FOR you, instead of TO you, you’ll immediately start to feel more positive and in control of your emotions.

A positive outlook on life can truly bring you more joy and a greater sense of fulfillment. So instead of always thinking about what you stand to lose in any given situation or interaction, focus on what could happen if you were wildly successful in everything you tried.

That’s not to say you won’t come up against your fair share of failure – everyone fails at some point in their lives. But the people who are truly successful take their failures in stride, treating them as a moment to learn from instead of something that will forever hold them back. Instead of assigning negative meaning to disempowering events, trade your expectations for appreciation.

Instead of thinking “I won’t get this job, so why bother going to the interview?” change your story so you feel appreciative. Try something more like, “All the time I’ve put into job-hunting and shaping my resume is starting to pay off.” This small shift in your mindset can lead to MAJOR results.

The next time you feel unsure of whether you should put yourself out there, or you’re tempted to let a minor setback ruin your day, take a moment for yourself. Breathe deeply and try to see the situation in context – is this worth getting upset over? Or is there a way you can change your story and take this incident in stride? YOU are in control of your emotions.

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Tony Robbins is a #1 New York Times best-selling author, entrepreneur, and philanthropist. For more than 37 years, millions of people have enjoyed the warmth, humor and dynamic presentation of Mr. Robbins’ corporate and personal development events. As the nation’s #1 life and business strategist, he¹s called upon to consult and coach some of the world¹s finest athletes, entertainers, Fortune 500 CEOs, and even presidents of nations.